How to be Perfect—Almost

By Ron Padgett

1. Get some sleep.

2. Eat an orange every morning.

3. Be friendly, it will make you happy.

4. Hope for everything, Expect nothing.

5. Take care of things close to home first. Straighten your room
before you save the world; then save the world.

6. Be nice to people before they have a chance to behave badly.

7. Don’t stay angry about anything for more than a week, but don’t
forget what made you angry.

8. Hold your anger at arm’s length, look at it as if it were a glass
ball—then add it to your glass ball collection.

9. Wear comfortable shoes.

10. Don’t spend too much time with large groups of people.

11. Plan your day so you never have to rush.

12. Show appreciation for people who do things for you even if you
have paid them, even if they do favors that you don’t want.

13. After dinner, wash the dishes.

14. Calm down.

15. Don’t expect your children to love you—so they can if they want to.

16. Don’t be too self critical or too self congratulatory.

17. Don’t think progress exists. It doesn’t.

18. Imagine what you would like to see happen; then don’t do anything to make it impossible.

19. Forgive your country every once in a while. If that’s not possible go to another one.

20. If you feel tired, rest.

21. Don’t be depressed about growing older. It will make you feel even older, which is depressing.

22. Do one thing at a time.

23. If you burn your finger put ice on it immediately. If you bang your finger
with a hammer hold your hand in the air for 20 minutes. You will be
surprised by the curative powers of ice and gravity.

24. Take a deep breath.

25. Do not smart off to a policeman.

26. Be good.

28. Be honest with yourself, diplomatic with others.

29. Do not go crazy a lot. It’s a waste of time.

29. Drink plenty of water. When asked what you would
like to drink say, “Water, please.”

31. Take out the trash.

32. Love life.

33. Use exact change.

34. When there’s shooting in the street don’t go near the window.

35. Be nice to smokers – a bad habit does not make a bad person.

I added the last one…

 May Your Glass Always Be Half Full
__________________

 

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About Maxi

Hi … I'm Maxi, a retiree with an addiction. I have quit: raising kids, cleaning house, cooking, doing laundry—there is no end the list—everything is done on "have to." The addiction? Writing to my last breath. blessings ~ maxi
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