What To Do When Life Spins Out of Control

rewritten post by maxi

One night I am driven by a need to leave the house and go outside. I step from the porch and walk into the darkness. Everything in me freezes as I gape at the blackness of the sky. For the first time in life I am overwhelmed by the spectacle.

My head turns back and forth at the countless number of stars, some bigger and brighter than others. My eyes can’t get enough of the shapes, the dance, the sparkle.
They dart from one star to another until I find what I’m looking for.

“Is that really it?” I wonder aloud. “Looks like fiery bubbles are blastin’ from the rim.”

Without warning, a massive explosion fills the huge scoop of the ‘Big Dipper.’ Human bodies burst from the bubbles and scatter into the universe. Faces flash with anxiety and fear, arms and legs are twisted and bloated. They toss and tumble as if thrown about in a revolving kaleidoscope.

DipperI lean closer and yes— one of those bodies belong to me. My heart pounds, terror grips my mind, my heart, my body. This can’t be possible. And then…

I wake up.

Only the nightmare lingers. This is real. You know what I mean. A time when life begins a dance that flits from a waltz, to a tango, to a jitterbug. And the beat goes on—until you are worn out and worn down. And you slip to the floor like a wind-up clown that has run out of fizzle.

ClownYour body is curled and tense as beads of sweat pool on your lashes. There is no way to turn off your mind. It runs incessantly, as if to drive you mad. You are unaware that a remedy skirts around the fringes of the never-ending babble.

It’s a whisper spoken into an “open” ear…

“It is not the problem but the decision that creates the pressure.”

Determination takes hold and the tremble begins to cease, the rapid pulse slows to normal, the fire in your face starts to cool. The dance is over. Resolve has seeped into your senses. You rise up anew.

Whatever problems straddle your path, whatever intrusions invade your peace, you can make a choice on how to deal with the obstacles and move forward. You will not look back, will not second guess your decisions, will not live with regrets…

Joy is waitin’ round the bend.

                 May Your Glass Always Be Half Full

My buddies at the LBC have their own tales to tell:
Blackwatertown, Maxi, Maria/Gaelikaa,
Padmum, Ramana, Shackman speaks, The Old Fossil

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About Maxi Malone

Hi … I'm Maxi, a retiree with an addiction. I have quit: raising kids, cleaning house, cooking, doing laundry—there is no end the list—everything is done on "have to." The addiction? Writing to my last breath.
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